Someone Like That
by 4TAE
Summary: When Levi unwillingly goes to a fashion show, his hopes aren't high- all he expects is lousy eyecandy and maybe some acceptable wank material. Instead, he gets Erwin Smith, model extraordinaire and certified hunk.


Levi has no idea how his Saturday evening has ended up with him watching several half-naked men strut down the aisle, but it probably has something to do with Hange and her disturbing hobby of stalking handsome men.

Which brings him here- stuck in a stuffy, dark room that's filled with too many people and cameras for Levi's liking. To add to that, the beams of light centered upon the runway strip are so fucking _bright_ that he wants to claw his eyes out. It's like staring directly into a lightbulb, and no matter how relieving the sight of handsome male models is, his eyes still feel like they're melting in pain.

Levi grimaces. The air is humid and disgustingly heavy on his skin. He abhors the suffocating feeling of heat and germs pressing against him from all sides; he wants _out_ , but the door is all the way across the room, and people are smothering him from all angles. He wishes he brought a handkerchief of some kind; sweat is starting to bead on his forehead from the hot air, consisting of Levi guesses to be the combined body heat of a hundred or so spectators – which, when he thinks about it, is absolutely and horrendously _revolting_.

Skin crawling with disgust, he tries to ignore any thoughts about bacteria and instead turns his attention back to the runway.

So far, none of the models have caught his eye. They're all undeniably handsome men, strapping and gorgeous with perfect bodies, but too _typical_ for Levi's tastes. They look like they've been copied and pasted right out of a magazine, which makes sense, considering they're models- but Levi can't help but think that they're rather droll.

He could probably wank off to them- that is, if he wanted a half-hearted wank that would leave him feeling barely satisfied.

Levi yawns. As much as he's enjoyed the glorious sight of hard muscles and pecs, every other model that appears on the runway is starting to look exactly the same. How long as been here? Two hours, maybe? It feels like a year to Levi, whose legs are cramping up badly as he watches clone after clone walk by. Sadly, there's no space to stretch them – the seats are clustered too close together.

Levi silently groans, remembering that Hange mentioned that this show would last at least a couple hours. He hopes that she's wrong, because he's sure he'll die of boredom or bacterial infestation before then.

Another extravagantly dressed model appears at the end of the runway, posing suavely and evoking a round of camera clicking. Utterly bored, Levi chances a quick look at his companion. He can only see a sliver of Hange's excited expression from his seat, but the sight is enough to send shivers up his spine; the woman's teeth are bared, her eyes wide and glazed over, and at the corner of her mouth is a bead of drool.

 _Christ_. Levi frowns disapprovingly at the appearance of the deranged woman next to him. Since this is a semi-formal event, he reels back the urge to lecture her- until he notices the device in her lap.

"What the bloody hell- _Hange_! Why did you bring a fucking pair of binoculars?! This isn't a baseball game!" Levi fiercely hisses, staring at the binoculars sitting innocently in Hange's lap. They're not even normal, hand-sized binoculars; the gadget takes up all of her lap, and from what he can see, are equipped with multiple lenses.

Hnage shrugs with ease. "Shush," she nonchalantly whispers back, eyes firmly attached to the runway, too taken by the attractive models to even spare him a head turn.

Levi _tsk_ 's loudly and sits back in his chair as he watches as another stream of undeniably gorgeous models emerge from behind the stage, all equipped with perfect body proportions.

He used to dream of having a body like that, until he realized that his efforts would be for naught; he spent his days teaching little brats and his weekends devising lesson plans to teach those brats. His clubbing days were long gone, replaced with days worrying about rent and tax returns, while his numerous one-night stands and promiscuity were replaced with his right hand and porn. It's certainly not his dream life, but he's content with what he has. He just wishes that his immature students would take his class more seriously and actually study instead of turning in lackadaisical homework that clearly lacks any effort whatsoever.

Speaking of lazy, immature children…

"Hey, that brat right there…" Levi points at a lithe model that had just appeared from behind the crystal screens. The lanky, brunette model is smiling stupidly, a vast difference from the stony, monotonous faces of the other models.

"That's Eren Yeager," Hange says excitedly, lifting her binoculars and turning the knobs on the device as she focuses them onto the brown-haired model that Levi pointed at. "A decently new model, but rising quickly in popularity with his boy-next-door aura. Why, do you think he's hot? He is pretty cute, huh? Especially those dimples …" She trails off dreamily.

Levi squints critically at the brown-haired model. Eren Yeager is strutting down the runway with an air of confidence and a self-satisfied expression, clad in a scanty one-piece that makes Levi feel like a pedophile. A few uncultured cries of fangirls ring out when the model reaches the end of the runway and drags his shirt up, revealing a tan column of muscles.

"No, he makes me mad for no reason," Levi says with pursed lips as he watches the model sway his hips back and forth down the runway. "He might be eye-candy to anyone with shitty eyesight. Personally, I'd rather suffocate my cock than jerk off to… to _that_. He looks like one of those teenage kids that never do their homework and fall asleep in class all the time."

And he knows it's true ( _really!_ ) because Eren Yeager was in his class two years ago for remedial Biology, and that little fucker made Levi want to yank his hairs out and bang his head against the wall repeatedly. Not only had Yeager failed all of his tests, he fell asleep during class all the time, and even dared to call Levi by his first name once. It's a good thing that Yeager is blessed with good looks because Levi honestly thinks Yeager would have failed in all other careers, being the natural idiot he is.

Levi fumes just thinking about the time when the idiotic brunette turned in homework that was unnamed, unnumbered, written with a pink pen, and done on the back of an English essay. Had it been a video game, Eren would've scored four consecutive critical hits and K.O.'ed Levi in one go.

"What? I think he's adorable," Hange pouts. "Look at that tan and green eyes! Isn't that just a killer combination? He looks like a prince from an exotic country!"

"No, he looks like fucking cliché," Levi snorts dismissively. "And he probably is one too. You know, with good looks but bad personality?"

Or, in Yeager's case, bad brains.

"But…" Hange whines, looking put off. "Don't you dare tell me you wouldn't want that in your bed! I mean, look at that! Total eye-candy." She presses forward in her seat, trying to get a better look at the brunette model.

Levi wonders if she would be turned off by the fact that the idiot still couldn't list the differences between Krebs cycle, glycolysis, and the electron transport train by the time he graduated high school.

Scrunching his nose, he shoots Hange a thoroughly disgusted look. "I'd be arrested for pedophilia- what is he, like fourteen or something? _Gross_ ," he says, wisely ignoring her quip about wanting Yeager in his bed, because he thinks he might throw up just thinking about it.

"Nineteen!" Hange declares. "His birthday was just a few days ago, he tweeted some birthday celebration pictures that I saved- and guess what? He's taller than you! Isn't that great? You like your men tall, right?

Indeed he does; tall men seem more dignified and mature, but Eren Yeager is none of those. If anything, he's the complete opposite, as well as the literal definition of what Levi _never_ wants to date. He just can't handle types like Eren Yeager.

Levi shoots her a disgusted look in return. "You know his birthday, height, and saved his twitter photos? That's just fucking _creepy_."

"I take pride in my research," Hange says smugly, setting the binoculars down onto her lap. "Oh, look, here he comes!" She fans herself with the paper program, pink-faced and short-breathed when the brunette model twirls around and starts walking in their direction.

Even Levi has to grudgingly admit that Eren Yeager has filled out nicely from the awkward, lanky youth that he was. If only his brains had filled up the empty space in his head as well… _Alas_ , Levi mentally snarks. Yeager is definitely not boyfriend material. Especially not with the doofy grin that briefly appears on his face that screams ' _Wow, I can't believe I just did this!_ ' just before he disappears backstage.

"Still too young," Levi firmly decides. "My tastes run more to…" He pauses, searching for the right word to use.

"To no one." Hange cuts in. "Sheesh, Levi. You have men drooling over you everywhere, yet you drop them faster than the speed of light. Isn't it time you found someone that'll last longer than, oh, what was it- half a day?"

"Not my fault that there's no decent men these days," Levi scoffs.

"No one is ever up to your standards," Hange complains with an eyeroll. "Seriously, Levi- do you plan to live a celibate life alone with just you and your right hand and an occasional one-night stand?"

Levi gives a noncommittal shrug. He doesn't really care, to be honest- he was never the type for long lasting relationships, anyways. Yawning, he asks, "So when is this boring ass show going to be over anyways?'

Hange makes an unhappy noise. "Aw, don't be so impatient. It's nearly over, anyways- see? I think that's the last model." Hange points at a shadowy figure stepping onto the runway at the same time a loud murmur arises from the crowd.

One camera goes off, then another- and soon, the cameras are clicking in frenzy and making the room seem like there's a thousand little explosions going off at once. The noise only increases in volume as the figure begins his way down the runway. Levi stuffs his fingers into his ears when a few girls behind him start screeching loudly.

Levi is utterly bewildered by what is happening; he cranes his neck in an effort to get a better look at the figure, but the figure is still too far away for him to see clearly. He tries to turn around to ask Hange what the actual _fuck_ is going on, but is nearly blinded by the rapidly blinking flash of lights.

Levi swears loudly – his eyes feel like they're bleeding, his legs are aching badly, and on top of all that, he still doesn't know what- or who- has created such chaos. Vision blurry with multicolored blots from the bright lights, he squints at the runway, trying to spot the source of all this mayhem, but it's no use- whatever has arrived is too far away for him to see.

"That's Erwin Smith!" Hange shouts in his ear, pointing at something far off in the distance.

"Give me those binoculars." Curiosity getting the better of him, Levi doesn't wait for Hange's reply as he swipes the device from her hands. He trains the binoculars in the direction that Hange had pointed at, falters, and goes very, very still.

 _Jesus Christ._

Erwin Smith is a certified hunk. Tall, broad-shouldered, and finely muscled, the man's body is a goddamn temple that Levi wants to bow down to and worship.

Levi lets out a shuddering breath, feeling his pants suddenly grow a thousand times tighter.

" _Finally_ you're useful for something. That blondie right there is grade-A wank material. See, now, someone like _that_ is what I'd consider my taste."

Even the model's face is eye-catching; Erwin is classically handsome with Romanesque features, including a strong set jaw, full lips, straight nose, and a pair of light blue eyes that nearly send Levi spiraling out of his seat in excitement (an exaggeration, of course). Neatly fashioned on top of model's head is windswept, golden hair; a few licks of hair stick up here and there, achieving the perfect blend between casualness and perfection.

Of course, Erwin's body is not to be forgotten; his skin tone is a mixture of cream and gold, and looks marvelous stretched out across toned thighs, a six-pack, and broad shoulders.

 _Christ_. The things that Levi wants that body to do to him…

"You hypocrite- how are green eyes, brown hair, and tanned skin anymore of a cliché than blue eyes, blonde hair, fair skin? If anything, it's the cliché of the clichés-"

"Shut up," Levi demands. He unconsciously shifts forward in his seat until he's leaning precariously on the edge of the chair. Hange swats at him, trying to grab her binoculars back. Holding the binoculars out of reach, Levi turns his back to her and murmurs, "Look at that splendid crotch."

Fuck. He wants to touch that crotch, as terribly wrong as it sounds.

The lady sitting to his other side gives him a scandalized look but Levi ignores her in favor of trying to focus the binoculars onto the model's lower body. The blonde's groin is obviously well-packaged. Not to mention it isn't even erect… Levi licks his lips lecherously. He could truly, and gladly, enjoy wanking off to the handsome Adonis…

… if only Hange could stop prodding his ribs with her chicken arms.

" _Stop it_ , you lecherous cow," Levi scowls. "I'm trying to imprint his bulge into my mind." He elbows Hange back, pulling a pained grunt from the annoying woman.

His initial thoughts are confirmed when the strapping blonde steps closer to their seating area. Clad in a unbuttoned dark blue suit and matching slacks that shows off his amazing abdominal muscles and toned body, Erwin Smith is indeed one of the most handsome men Levi has ever seen (and he's seen a _lot_ , to be fair).

The model is positively brimming with confidence, yet unlike Yeager's annoying, cocky grin, the blonde is wearing a dazzling, charismatic smile full that makes Levi swoon-

 _\- just kidding_. Levi scoffs to himself- he _might_ be a little short–breathed, but he most certainly does not _swoon_.

(Swooning is for premature little girls with silly crushes, not for grown men that are well past their twenties. )

"Erwin's been one of the top male models for at least a half a decade now. He's modeled for Armani, Calvin Klein, Ralph Lauren, Dolce & Gabbana, Louis Vuitton, Hugo, TAG Heuer… and so many more." Hange cuts off and sighs dreamily when Erwin exposes his chest with an expert downwards flick of the hand. Levi is tempted to join in and sigh as well, but he reigns in the urge and instead drinks in the sight of the model's well-sculpted shoulders.

He doesn't know at least half of the brands she just listed, but it doesn't matter anyways – especially not when Erwin Smith has a marvelous chest, complete with wiry muscles and dark nipples that contrast beautifully against his golden skin-

He's definitely not swooning. Levi nods savagely to himself; he's merely admiring the beauty of the handsome male specimen in front of him, who is currently showing off a variety of poses that make his mouth water.

Just as Erwin poses one last time (strong jaw facing ahead, feet casually set apart, strong arms hanging loosely by his sides), the blonde's gaze flicker over their seating section, throwing a fake, flirty wink in their general direction. Half of the crowd positively _screams_ , while the other half look like they're about to faint onto the floor.

Levi scowls and cups his ears, casting a frown over his shoulder at the audience. Normally, his glare would be enough to scare a classroom of twenty seven kids into absolute silence, but it seems like it's ineffective against rabid fans. Tragic, truly.

Rolling his eyes at the audience's antics, Levi turns around and looks back at the runway, when he suddenly feels like a deer caught in the headlights.

Or, really, really blue lights. That are circular, clear, and deep-set into a masculine face. Because, he thinks, that Erwin is looking directly at _him_ , and beneath the thick, curled eyelashes, his eyes are an intense blue that Levi just wants to drown in forever-

 _Hey_ , the blue orbs seem to say. _Hey, you._

Levi blinks. Heart hammering, he looks around himself, then back up at the stage, and there it is- a small, amused glint in the model's eyes, as if they know exactly what confusion Levi is facing at the moment.

And then the blonde model winks again, but this time it's slow and deliberate and _real_ – and call him crazy, but Levi now _knows_ that the model is looking directly at _him_.

"Did he just wink at me?!" Hange squeals excitedly.

 _No, he winked at me_ , Levi wants to say. Instead he shrugs- _you're going delusional_ , his mind helpfully supplies, _no doubt you imagined that moment, you're merely a bit off in the head due to the death-inducing cries of the audience_.

"I think he winked at the crowd," Levi grunts, watching as the blonde model walks away in slow, relaxed steps before disappearing behind the stage, much to the audience's (and his own) disappointment. Hange in particular gives a loud sigh.

"Mm, those muscles. I'd do anything to get my hands on those biceps..." she remarks. "What a frighteningly handsome man… the things I'd let him do to me, you know?"

For the first time since an eternity, Levi agreed with Hange.

* * *

After a lengthy closing speech and live performance by some generic pop artist, Levi immediately pushes his way out of the room. Finding a secluded alcove in the entrance hall, he drags Hange there and gives her the sternest glare he can manage.

"That was a fucking mess," he growls, casting a wary glance at the swarm of people behind them. "I can't believe you dragged me here just for _that_."

"Aw, don't complain! You seemed to like Erwin Smith just fine, anyways."

Levi snorts in derision.

"He's okay," he finally admits after a second of thought. Hange gives him a smug grin, and Levi shoots it down with an immediate, "But would I go through all that just to see a handsome man? No fucking way."

"Peh," Hange makes a distracted noise. Licking her lips, she looks behind her with an eager expression on her face. "Can you wait here for a sec? I'm gonna see if I can sneak into the waiting rooms. I might be able to nab a souvenir or two… maybe a discarded shirt or – oh yes, _underwear_ if I'm lucky."

"You're _what?_ " Levi repeats incredulously, but Hange has disappeared in a blink of an eye before he could utter another word. He swears loudly.

Seriously, that woman would be the end of him one day. He flattens himself against the wall and crosses his arms, resigning himself to glaring at anyone that walks past him.

He can't believe Hange just ditched him. Of course, it's just his fucking luck that Hange is the one with the car keys; he _knew_ he should've taken his car today. What can he do now that he's stranded here? _Fuck_. If only he could teleport, he dryly thinks to himself.

Someone behind him clears his or her throat. Levi jerks away from the wall at once.

The first thing he notices when he turns around is that the man that approached him is shirtless, which is... odd. As if that weren't alarming enough, the stranger is wearing a cap with the tail pulled so low that their face is completely hidden from sight. Though, the stranger is definitely a man, if the perfectly chiseled abs and flat chest are anything to go by.

"Hey," the stranger says in a low, husky voice. The rough tone of the stranger's voice sends a tingle up Levi's spine.

He looks the man over warily, arching a thin brow when he notices a diamond studded watch on the man's wrist. _How… tacky_. And probably fake, Levi guesses _._ "Can I help you with something?"

"Listen, I was wondering…" the man abruptly pauses, trailing off into a hesitant silence that lingers for a few seconds too long for Levi's liking. Especially with the way that the stranger is glancing at him, seemingly observing him and making him feel like he's being dissected apart into tiny little pieces.

Feeling defensive all of a sudden, Levi crosses his arms and leans further against the wall in the most casual manner he can manage. "I'm listening," Levi flatly states and imposingly sticks his chin out.

The man gives an unsure smile in response, seemingly to be taken aback at his bluntness. "Would you," the man says, and then pauses again. He reaches up and tugs the cap down further with a muttered, "Oh, fuck it…" that Levi would have missed if not for his keen ears, trained from years of listening for conversations behind his back- one of the only perks of being a teacher.

Without a warning, the stranger's hand shoots out and grabs Levi's wrist. "What the-" Levi instinctively shouts. The stranger wrenches the door next to them open, cutting off Levi's shout as he's forcefully tugged inside.

Too surprised to react, Levi stumbles on his feet, bewildered and dazed by the vertigo of the sudden movement until the telltale, clicking noise of a lock that may or may not signal his imminent doom.

What. The. Fuck.

Snapping back to reality, Levi whirls around with clenched fists and growls menacingly at the stranger. " _What the fuck do you think you're doing-"_ Levi stops mid-sentence when the stranger chucks off his hat, revealing the handsome face of Erwin Smith. "- _oh_."

"Oh," Levi slowly repeats, while inside he's still screaming _what the bloody fuck is going on_ , and _is that the hunk I'd gladly masturbate to on a daily basis_.

He also can't help but think that his situation sounds exactly like the start of an awfully bad porno, but instead of vocally voicing these thoughts, he stares dumbly at the model in front of him.

Erwin Smith, or possibly the clone of Erwin Smith, looks even better up close. The blonde has a five o'clock shadow around his jaw, and Levi wants nothing more than to touch the light shadow of stubble on the model's square chin. He's always had a particular weakness for stubble, and for the handsome model to be standing less than a meter away from him to have that particular trait seems like nothing short of a dream.

Fully convinced that he's hallucinating, Levi blinks a few times. He even discreetly pinches the inside of his forearm, but the image of Erwin Smith doesn't flicker away. The man in front of him is _real_ \- he's breathing, moving, and his handsome, unblemished face is twisted into an apologetic grimace.

"Sorry for being so forceful with you, but I wanted to talk to you," the model is saying as Levi continues to stare at the blonde hunk. _You can be forceful with me any day, baby,_ Levi wants to say, but it would be dreadfully inappropriate of him, so he just bobs his head in response.

"I'm Erwin Smith," the model continues with a genial smile that almost looks fake- except that Levi knows it's not, because the same smile is reflected in the model's sea blue eyes, which are glinting at him with a mixture of curiosity and amusement.

Levi clears his throat haughtily, trying to regain his senses, lest he make a fool of himself. "So I've heard," Levi drawls, smiling tightly. "It's hard not to know when there's a hundred girls screaming your name at the top of their lungs when you appear."

Erwin winces and shoots him another apologetic grin, which Levi cannot for the life of himself understand _why_ , because it's obviously not the model's fault. "I apologize."

Levi shifts uncomfortably, suddenly reminded of the fact that the model is shirtless. His eyes unconsciously gravitate downwards. "Not your fault," he shrugs out, mouth running dry at the glorious body in front of him. Unbidden tension arises in his groin as he flicks his eyes up and down the model's body, because _damn_ , that is one masterpiece of a six-pack. He'd love to drag his tongue over the finely chiseled muscles of this modern Adonis. Even better would be to feel them against his lower back as he's fucked into oblivion.

Levi can't help but let his eyes wander to the space between man's hipbones, where a light trail is trailing downwards.

"I don't believe I got your name…?"

"… Levi," Levi answers automatically while staring at the model's crotch. The bulge is prominent against the model's tightly-fitted jeans, and Levi can't help but wonder what it would taste like. He knows he's acting like a shameless pervert, but hey, who can blame him? It's not every day that a shirtless hunk of a model is standing five feet in front of him.

Erwin has one eyebrow raised expectantly. Realizing that the model is waiting for him to say something more than just his name, Levi reluctantly stops eye-fucking the model and mutters, "Teacher."

Erwin's blue eyes crinkle at the edges as he grins – the model's either a naturally smiley person, or he's caught on to Levi's little staring session. Probably the latter of the two, Levi thinks, completely unabashed at the prospect of being caught. "A teacher, huh," Erwin muses in a low voice. "You like teaching?"

"It's a mixture of dreaded responsibility and wanting to kill yourself," Levi answers truthfully. "Joy is rare, especially when you're faced with a horde of snot-nosed brats."

Erwin's laugh comes directly from his stomach, deep and rumbling in its tones and strangely reminding Levi of how Santa would laugh- not in its vocal similarity, but in the light, good-natured feel of it that makes him want to puke rainbows. "I bet you're a good teacher. A no nonsense one, right?"

Levi looks at him with a ' _are you serious'_ expression, as if the answer wasn't painfully obvious already. "What else did you expect? Of course there's no nonsense in my classroom." He gives a disdainful sniff.

Erwin looks all too amused at his response. Levi frowns when Erwin doesn't say anything else, the room falling under a tense and awkward silence- so it comes as a complete surprise when Erwin closes the distance between them and invades Levi's private space with three swift steps.

 _Shit_ , _he's massive_. Levi swallows hard at the looming man above him; he can feel the hard muscles of Erwin's chest pressed up against his chin, and he knows that if he looks up, he'll see the underside of Erwin's chin. He looks forward, mesmerized by the bobbing of the man's jugular as the man speaks.

"Look," Erwin breathes, his breath heavy and hot on Levi's ear. "We can do this two ways; you can walk away and we'll probably never meet again unless by chance. Or, we can just not give a shit and fuck right here. How about it?"

Levi pauses. He looks up at the same time Erwin looks down, the tip of their noses almost touching as Levi searches the model's electrifying gaze with his own, expecting to find any hint of joking or playfulness.

Only… he finds nothing but dead seriousness.

Well, then.

Erwin Smith certainly cuts to the chase. Not that Levi isn't against it- he's never had that high of a moral standard anyways- rather, the idea of casual sex with a model in a dressing room excites him more than it should.

Still- he can't help but think that the situation is a tad ridiculous. He shoots Erwin a skeptical glance, but the man is looking down at him with the same severity as before.

He's got nothing to lose, right? With that in mind, Levi licks his lips, a devilish smirk spreading on his face. Erwin gives him a questioning cock of the head.

"Well…. why not." Levi laces his voice with a sultry, husky undertone. He revels in his small victory when the blonde model's pupils dilate along with a sharp intake of breath.

"Great," the bigger man says, a small smile flitting briefly over his lips as he places his hands on either side of Levi's hips, turning him around until Levi finds himself face to face with the wall with his back pressed firmly against the blonde's muscular one.

Levi doesn't say anything – he doesn't _need_ to say anything, especially with the electrifying heat of Erwin's body against his- and simply stares straight at the wall as a hand winds around his waist and slips up his torso. Nimble fingers pluck at the buttons of his shirt until the fabric divides itself, revealing his pale skin.

The appendages skim across his abdomen, mapping out his body and venturing across his sides and around his navel in butterfly light touches. "Having fun?" Levi asks, looking down and watching as the calloused fingers crawl up and down his torso, exploring his body and leaving no place untouched.

His breath hitches when a forefinger brushes over his pebbling nipple. The finger pauses, draws back, and goes over the bud again.

"Mm," Erwin sighs, dipping his nose into the crevice of Levi's neck. Levi involuntary twitches as something wet darts out and licks a stripe across his shoulder; the prickling sensation of stubble brushing across his shoulder is surprisingly arousing. "Your skin is soft."

Levi gives a small, dry laugh. "I hear that moisturizer does wonders." Erwin hums in response and buries his head further into the crook of the black-haired man's neck as the pads of his fingers dance idly over the smaller man's chest, drawing little circles and triangles that burn like fire on his skin.

Levi's breath stutters when Erwin's hands move downwards, unbuttoning and sliding down both Levi's trousers and underwear until they hang right beneath his buttocks. Big, rough hands settle on his hipbones, and Levi almost screams with frustration when the bigger man's begin threading his fingers themselves through the short patch of hair above his cock, but never making contact with his aching cock.

"You fucking tease," Levi grumps impatiently, shuddering as the calloused finger pads knead at his inner thighs. Erwin's low chuckle vibrates against his neck, just as fingertips trickle up to his scrotum.

Levi breathes a sigh of relief when Erwin finally touches the base of his cock. The model uses his thumb and forefinger to create a ring around his cock, squeezing the base and stroking it up and down with vigor while he suckles at the smaller man's neck, feasting upon it with hot stripes of his tongue and little nips of his teeth.

"Wait," Erwin suddenly says, detaching himself from the man's shoulder. Levi can hear the sound of a zipper being unzipped behind him. Curious, he looks over a shoulder- and immediately freezes.

It's even better than Levi had imagined- and much, much bigger than he expected. Knees shaking in anticipation, he stares at the appendage with wide eyes.

Feeling his mouth go dry, he croaks, "Have you done cock modeling for Viagra before?"

Erwin pauses in the midst of sliding on a condom, looking visibly surprised, "No?"

"You should," Levi tells him with a breathy huff. "They won't even need to photoshop… that." He nods towards Erwin's package with a meaningful look.

Erwin chuckles, staring at Levi barely concealed lust. He reaches out and (…fondly?) tucks a stray piece of hair behind Levi's ears. "You have an astounding way of talking, Levi." Patting the black-haired man's rear, he leans down and murmurs into Levi's ear, "It's hot, you know? Now, turn around - front to the wall, love."

 _Who are you calling love_ , Levi wants to say as he turns back to the wall. Instead, his words are swallowed up when Erwin cups a hand around his bare buttocks, smoothing over the plump flesh with small strokes. He catches a faint, fruity scent from behind him- lube, he reckons- and shivers when he feels Erwin's thumb probe his entrance. The gesture starts off timid and gentle, but once the model's slicked up appendages have inched inside his entrance and are tucked snugly within his walls, Erwin begins thrusting his fingers in a less than shy pace.

Knuckles rub against his walls, smoothly sliding back and forth until they bump into a place that makes Levi's head jolt up and toes curl. Erwin abuses that particular spot, crooking his finger up and pressing against the nub of pleasure until Levi's biting his lip so hard he thinks he tastes blood on his tongue.

Levi swallows- partly in pleasure and partly in the abrupt realization that Erwin Smith, esteemed male model, is finger fucking him – something that hits him with the force of a truck, just like the wave of pleasure that is threatening to snap at any moment now.

"Not yet," Erwin says sternly. Levi gasps out when the fingers slip out of him with a wet _pop_ , leaving behind an immense feeling of loss. Instead, the fingers are replaced by something substantially bigger and hotter.

"Uh, ngh… f-fuck you," Levi groans as the spongy tip of Erwin's cock starts to press its way inside; he can feel his entrance starting to stretch open in the most painfully blissful way. He's never been much of a size queen, but there's an odd sense of satisfaction that rises up within him as each centimeter of the cock fills him up to the brim. When it's fully slipped inside, Levi is panting and struggling to keep his tone even as he spits out, voice trembling, "Hate you, blondie."

"I'm sure you do." Levi shivers at the low, amused voice next to his ear. Erwin chuckles, the model's lips vibrating deliciously against his earlobe. "But for now, shush and let me fuck you."

And fuck him he does. Erwin rocks his hips back and forth slowly, fucking Levi with slow, measured thrusts. At first, all Levi can feel is a tight stretching in his bottom, but gradually, the carefully aimed thrusts pave way to an intense flare of pleasure that has Levi biting his lips and squeezing his eyes shut at the delicious burn of the large phallus sliding in and out of his rear.

"A quiet one, aren't you?"

"S-screaming is, _ah_ , uncouth," Levi pants out, twisting his body at the immense pleasure.

Erwin thrusts harder, and Levi chokes on his breath and moans- loudly. Levi whips his head around and casts a glare over his shoulder. Erwin merely laughs in response, reaches down, and grasps Levi's cock in his hand and begins to fist it in time with his thrusts.

"God, Erwin- " Levi moans, crying out at the double stimulation of his front and rear.

"Bet you never had a cock like this," Erwin whispers huskily into his ear, evoking a shuddering sigh from the shorter man.

"Damn right I haven't," Levi agrees, throwing his head back when a particularly harsh thrust shoves his nipples against the wall. He silently moans at the sensation of plaster sliding against his sensitive buds. Even though he's secretly enjoying the rough treatment, he mutters, "Hey, watch it!"

"Sorry, sorry. I got a bit excited," Erwin says, sounding not at all apologetic as he continues to thrust with fervor. Levi rolls his eyes, but the movement of his pupils is cut off when the tip of Erwin's cock rubs his prostrate, sparking jolt of pleasure through his body.

"There?" Erwin asks, hitting the same exact spot again and again, and Levi sees stars. It feels absolutely exquisite, and Levi wants this to go on forever, except that keeping the pleasure bottled within himself inside is starting to become painful.

Something wet slides over his lips and chin – bloody hell, is he drooling? – and Levi squeezes his eyes tighter, trying to block out the sight of the masculine hand wrapped around his drooling cock. It's futile, though; balling his hands into tight fists, Levi quietly gasps as he recognizes the overwhelming pressure that's threatening to snap at any given second.

Shit, shit, shit. Levi swallows, clenches his fists tighter- desperately hoping that the pain will distract him enough to delay his orgasm. He manages to hold out due to some Herculian effort, but the inevitableness of his nearing orgasm quickly dawns upon him. He's so close that it _hurts_.

"I'm- I'm-" Levi pants out in between groans, knees buckling at the rush of pleasure-pain that's taking over his senses.

Erwin grunts in response, hips pumping faster until Levi can't hear anything other than his own breathy moans mixed in with slapping sound of skin against skin. It's desperate and demanding, and his legs are trembling as he tries to keep himself up. Christ, he feels so fucking _good_ \- it should be _illegal_ -

It's then that one of Erwin's hands wrap around his own, fingers curling between his own (how disgustingly cheesy). Embarrassingly enough, it's in that exact moment that Levi orgasms.

Levi comes with a keening, embarrassingly wanton cry. _Yesyesyes_ \- Levi digs his fingernails into the wall and _spasms_ , hips bucking erratically and cheek pressed against the wall as he rides out his release. His limbs spasm wildly- he's still coming- and Erwin's cock is still methodically fucking him at the perfect angle-

Levi moans, positively _trembling_ and completely breathless as the last of his orgasm leaves him.

The model behind him is much less vocal in his release; Levi merely feels the tightening of Erwin's hand against his own and a low, strangled hiss of his name.

Tired and spent, Levi leans forward, resting his forehead on the cool wall. Erwin is still wrapped around his body, gigantic hands on either side of his head and body encasing him against the wall like a human cocoon. If he weren't so fucked out, Levi would've leapt away from the sweaty wall of man meat behind him, but alas- the only action he can manage is a feeble grasp on Erwin's arm as he pulls himself up.

He's strangely bereft when Erwin pulls out and steps back, missing the feeling of the man's calloused fingers on his body and cock filling him to the brim. It's an unusual emotion – to _miss_ something- and is so oddly sentimental that he almost can't process the emotion into words.

"That was a good fuck," Levi mutters offhandedly as he pulls up his trousers. He straightens up and dusts off his clothes, grimacing when his hands brush across something wet and slimy. _Disgusting_. He should've known better than to have sex in his clothes. Now, he'll have to wash it with buckets of detergent before he can bear to wear the same outfit again.

Ignoring Erwin's gaze, because it's fucking awkward to make eye contact with your one-night (afternoon?) stand, he looks sideways at the wall and says seriously, "You should consider becoming a porn star if you stop modeling. I'd buy your videos in bulk."

Erwin stares at him as if expecting him to burst out in laughter. Levi truly means what he said though, so he crosses his arms and stares back with a "watcha-goin' to do about it" expression.

"Well… thanks. I'll keep that in mind, I guess." Poor blondie sounds unsure.

Levi nods. "You do that." Erwin sends him a tight smile in response.

Hearing a beeping noise coming from his pocket, Levi pulls out his phone and scowls when he sees ten missed calls and seven unread text messages, all from the same number. _Goddammit, Hange_. Levi scowls.

"I'm off now- my friend has probably gotten herself arrested while I was gone. Or murdered."

Erwin's expression is rueful. "So, I just wanted to say that-"

"Bye," Levi calmly informs him in a matter of fact tone. He sticks his hands into his pockets and heads straight for the door.

"Goddammit Levi, _wait_ -"

It turns out that Blondie's muscles aren't all for show, for it clearly shows as he grabs Levi's arm with the strength of a two-ton bull. Levi is sure that if he tries to pull away any further he'll probably end up jerking his own arm out of its socket. He glares at the firm grip on his arm, and in the most dangerous tone he can manage, growls out, "Release my arm, or I'll make you regret it."

Erwin complies at once, and Levi raises his eyebrow at the oddly obedient action. The model doesn't relent in his persuasion, though- because Erwin hurries ahead and stands in front of Levi, his large frame blocking the door from sight.

"Give me your number," Erwin says.

"No," Levi promptly answers.

Erwin looks unsurprised by his answer. He sighs, pulls out a business card from his shirt pocket, and hands it to Levi with a serious expression. "Here's my business card. I wrote my personal number on the back. Call me anytime, because I'd love to see you again in the future."

Levi's eyebrows scrunch together. For what reason would they need to see each other again in the future? He accepts the card out of politeness anyways.

"Call me," Erwin repeats with a fond smile.

Levi doesn't say anything- he stares, and when Erwin reaches out and takes his hand in his, he stares even harder.

Holding Levi's gaze, Erwin presses a chaste kiss to the pale man's knuckles, lips brushing across the skin gently until they touch the pulse point on his wrist, where another kiss is placed. When the model speaks again, lips still pressed on his skin, Levi can't help but flinch- he can feel the soft flutter of lips against his wrist with each word. It's strangely tender, _intimate_.

"I mean it, Levi. I'd really like this to be something. Or we can fuck again. Whatever you'd like."

Levi suppresses the urge to tremble, though he thinks he might already be by the way that Erwin looks adoringly at his wrist. Instead, he glares at the man and slowly drags out every syllable as he threateningly growls, " _Let go of my arm_."

Erwin's smile drops, his grip loosening immediately like he's touched a burning poker.

Levi can't help but raise his eyebrow at the subtle signs of distraught on the man's face. Erwin's thick eyebrows are subtly furrowed, a slight crinkle in between his eyes as he stares at Levi with unfathomable eyes. Levi catches the man biting on his lower lip, a habit that is strangely… endearing.

He blinks once, then twice, and knows that he's completely, absolutely fucked. And not just in the literal sense.

Levi exhales loudly. Fuck if he knows what he's doing. He'll probably regret his choice when he wakes up tomorrow. In fact, he just _knows_ that he'll regret what he's about to do.

"Fine. I'll give you my number."

Had Erwin been a dog, he would've perked up and started running around in joyful circles. Instead, Erwin beams at him with an absurdly handsome smile. Levi almost has to shield his eyes from the disgustingly blinding aura of satisfaction radiating from the blonde model. A vindictive urge to squash that satisfaction rises up within his stomach, but he swallows it down when Erwin hands him his cell phone.

"I didn't know what I would do if you didn't give me your number, short of kidnapping," Erwin admits while Levi reluctantly types his number into the man's phone.

Levi makes sure to type in ' _do not contact unless NECESSARY_ ' under the 'notes' section of his contact profile, courtesy of an ex that used to text him every hour with the smallest, obscure details. Needless to say, that relationship ended in less than a week because Levi absolutely _abhors_ the clingy types.

He sighs heavily and hands the iPhone back to Erwin, who inspects the screen with a raised brow.

"Seriously?"

"Yes, really. Or else I'll block your number."

Erwin merely smiles good-naturedly at Levi's threat. "Well, I shall make sure not to annoy you, then."

"I should expect so," Levi huffs, trying - and failing- to ignore the warm feeling that's spreading inside his chest.


End file.
